I have mentioned before in a past blog,
but the subject of race and diversity just keeps coming up and is
o-so important a subject to keep on discussing. I am hearing from an
international setting about the continuous murders
of black men at home, and the American peoples response, or lack
there of of a response. Race and diversity are also relevant to my
experience in Guyana as a white Peace Corps Volunteer amidst a sea of
brown. I am experiencing being the center of attention simply because
of my white, (sometimes pink) skin and blue eyes; but in contrast to
the experiences of minorities in the United States, I am constantly
told how they want my skin color and how beautiful it is. I am envied
for my white skin, and it is as uncomfortable as it sounds. I didn't
ask for it, it was what I was born with and for the first time I am
seeing that I can get away with things that my fellow Guyanese
friends or volunteers of color can not. I am truly seeing
and experiencing first hand the privileges that my
whiteness grants me and it is eyeopening and scary. Before my Peace
Corps experience, I had heard about white privilege, but never
experienced it firsthand; I was naive to it being very real and very
much alive in America. When I look back at my life before Peace
Corps, I can see the times when white privilege reared its ugly head
and popped in and out of my life at various points.
The other day, I was riding in a car
with a few other Peace Corps Volunteers and a Guyanese Peace Corps
staff member. The conversation turned to the upcoming election and
race issues in the United States. This staff member asked us why WE
thought there were so many race issues in the United States.
Collectively, without even thinking, we three white gyals immediately
responded, “lack of education”. When I was talking about education, I was talking about education pertaining to diversity and
the very real, very relevant and very much alive issue of racism in
America. The general consensus seemed to be that if you grow up in
“white, suburban middle-class America,” you probably aren't aware
there even is a race-war going on in the rest of the United States,
or if you are aware, you don't understand it; it isn't palpable. Most
white people have no personal relationship or experience with what
minorities go through every day; of the way they are treated
differently, ostracized in social settings, stared at and publicly
humiliated; or are receiving sub-standard educations, different –
inadequate - resources and poorly configured infrastructure in
certain neighborhoods and communities throughout the United
States. Or the fact that their very life is at risk everyday because
of the color of their skin. We (white people) simply cannot
understand the challenges that minorities have faced since the
beginning of colonization leading to slavery, and continuing
on to even today.
I will admit, that I fit into this
category of the unaware. I grew up in a white, middle class
neighborhood, with very few minorities represented as my classmates.
Everything I knew about being black, Muslim or gay, was from what I
read about, saw on television, or heard about from other people. I
had no real first hand experience or understanding of what diversity
truly was. Throughout my Peace Corps experience, we are constantly
challenged to question the world around us, break down cultural
barriers, let go of our own personal tunnel-vision and stereotypes,
and to embrace the uniqueness and beauty of the people around us; of
not only our host country but also our fellow diverse group of
volunteers. I will freely admit that before I came to Peace Corps
Guyana, I thought myself to be an open, accepting and
“color/race/ethnic blind” person... but that was simply naive.
Even if I thought I was “color blind”, I, grew up and came with
my own host of life experiences, interactions (or lack of
interactions) and understanding of what race, ethnicity, religion
and sexual orientation were. These “background informations”
amassed into my own personal rolodex of stereotypes. Maybe I
considered myself “color blind” because I didn't believe some of
the most outrageous, hurtful or hateful stereotypes, but there was
still enough in that card system to consider me racist. Admitting
that I was indeed prejudiced, in some way, towards people unlike
myself in appearance or belief, and that I was susceptible to even
the simplest of stereotypes has been a good first steps towards
acceptance. I still have a long journey to go. There are frequently
times when old stereotypes pop into my head that I must remember to stop
myself and mentally question their origin. I ask myself, “Why did I
just think that?” “Where did that thought/belief just come
from?”
I think the first step towards our
countries liberation is for us all (white, black, brown, Christian,
Muslim, Hindu, gay, straight etc.) to simply admit that we are,
individually and collectively, in fact prejudiced and racist towards
each other. When we can accept this fact, we can then move forward
and break down the stereotypes that we have been holding towards and
about each other. It is then that we can question their origin and
validity, and can challenge the misconceptions and squash the seeds
of hatred towards the different and unique. It is only after we admit
our weaknesses that we can start the healing in the United States and
begin the journey towards true acceptance of each other, creating a
stronger, beautiful, more unified United States, and in turn, becoming a true leader of peace in the world.
